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There’s this little known fact, right? Back in the day, in ancient Rome—like in the movie—they had brothels with fancy signs, like, um, phallic symbols! Can ya believe that? Made me laugh so hard I nearly choked on me sandwich! [mimes choking, pats chest] Phew, saved meself! But today, it’s all secretive, dodgy looks, whispers in alleys. Surprised me how sneaky it is, ya know? Like they’re hidin’ the “great beauty” of it all!

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Finally, I get my stuff and head out. I’m walking down the street, and I see this massive puddle. I’m talking like, “If I jump in that, I’m gonna need a boat!” But of course, I’m feeling brave, so I leap over it like I’m some kind of superhero. Nailed it! But then, BAM! I slip on the wet pavement. Classic me, right? I land right in front of the pub, The Olde Red Lion. I’m pretty sure the locals got a good laugh out of it.

Northampton community comes together to bury commemorative time capsule at Tilia Homes’ Landimore Park