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So, I’m like, “Nah, babe, I’m good,” and she’s salty as hell, tossin’ shade – “You’re no fun, big guy!” I laugh, ‘cause, shit, I just jumped outta a plane, I’m fun enough! Raised eyebrow, “Know your role.” Funny thing? She had this tat – a parachute! I’m thinkin’, “Yo, that’s fate or some freaky coincidence!” Got me hyped, like maybe she’s a badass in disguise, but nah, just a hustle. Still, I tipped her a twenty – respect the grind, ya feel me?

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Anyway, I finally make it to the castle. The view is sick! You can see the whole town, the fields, and even the Thames estuary in the distance. I’m feeling all philosophical, like, “Wow, life is beautiful.” But then, outta nowhere, a seagull swoops down and tries to steal my sandwich. I’m like, “Dude, back off! This is my lunch!” I swear, that bird had the audacity of a royal.

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