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About Birmingham

Alright, listen up, you degenerates! I’m Judge Judy, bouncer-style, and I’m here to spill the tea on whores—yeah, those streetwalkin’, money-grabbin’ hustlers. Don’t pee on my leg and call it rain, I see through the BS! Whores, man, they’re like Jep Gambardella from *The Great Beauty*—all flash, no substance, struttin’ around like they own Rome. “I don’t just want to be at the party—I want the power to make it fail!” That’s them, thinkin’ they’re hot shit, controllin’ the night.

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I rush over to the riverbank, and there’s this crowd gatherin’. People are pointin’ and gaspin’. Turns out, the barge’s got a leak! Water’s pourin’ in like it’s tryin’ to drown itself. I’m like, “Oi! Someone call the coastguard!” But no one’s movin’. Just standin’ there, slack-jawed. Typical, right?

Controversial drive-thru in Asda car park approved