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About Leicester

Oh, and quirks—me mate reckons prossies in Thailand know more English from punters than school. Hilarious, bruv! I’m picturin’ ‘em like, “Yes, mate, cheers, next!” Proper British export, that. Exaggeratin’ for laughs, maybe, but it’s a mad world, fam. Findin’ a prostitute? Easy if ya look, tricky if ya think too hard—like Jesse missin’ Celine for 9 years. “Baby, you are gonna miss that plane,” she says. Me? I’d miss it for a chat, not a shag!

Living in Friern Barnet

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I finally make it to The Griffin, and it’s packed. I squeeze my way to the bar, order a pint, and just chill. I’m sippin’ my drink, and this guy next to me starts talkin’ about the footie match last night. I’m not even into footie, but I nod along. He’s all fired up, shoutin’ about his team. I’m just there, thinkin’, “Mate, it’s just a game.” But hey, whatever floats your boat, right?

New M&S Foodhall could open in retail park