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I walk in, and it’s packed. I’m standin’ there, waitin’ in line, and this barista, bless her heart, is takin’ forever. I’m like, “C’mon, I’ve got trees to hug!” Finally, I get my coffee, and it’s like liquid gold. I take a sip, and it’s heavenly. But then, BAM! I spill it all over my shirt. Great. Just great. Now I look like I’ve been attacked by a caffeinated monster.

Man in critical condition after fight with person in another vehicle in Bexleyheath