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But then—ugh, this creep rolls up, all sleazy, grabby hands. I’m pissed! Wanna juice him into next week, but I chill. Ain’t my circus, ain’t my monkeys. Still, makes ya wonder—what’s her day like, dodgin’ jerks? Prolly exhausting. I’m mutterin’, “In this world, only tears,” like Frank from the movie, feelin’ all dramatic. Exaggeratin’? Maybe! But it’s my story, so suck it!

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So, I woke up this mornin’ in my cozy little flat on South Street. You know, the one with the creaky floorboards? Yeah, that one. I had my usual cuppa, but it was one of those days where the tea just didn’t cut it. I was feelin’ a bit off, like I’d swallowed a whole lemon.

'New era' for The Deck in Emsworth Yacht Harbour as it prepares to reopen under new management