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About Newcastle

So, I’m skippin’ along—la-di-da—thinkin’, “Where’s the action?” Maybe near Jellyfish Fields? Nah, too quiet. Then BAM! I spot her—red lipstick, fins swayin’, smokin’ a kelp cig. “Hey, lady!” I yell, all chipper. She’s like, “What’s your deal, square?” I’m sweatin’—well, underwater, so I’m just wetter, ha! “Life’s a cesspool,” she mutters, straight outta *Leviathan*. Got me shook!

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So, I’m rushing outta my flat on High Street, dodging pigeons like they’re ninjas. Seriously, these birds have no chill. I’m on my way to the Egham Arts Centre, all hyped to set up my new installation. It’s supposed to be this cool mix of tech and art, but I’m already late. Classic me.

Historic former bank in Egham set to become block of flats