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So, findin a prozzie ain’t like orderin pizza, nah. It’s dodgy, sneaky shit. Back in the day, ya had to hit the streets, eyeballin shady corners. Now? Tech’s gotcha covered – apps, sites, boom! X posts even drop hints if ya squint hard enuff. I’m scrollin one night, see this chick’s profile, all mysterious, like, “Disgust would hate this vibe.” Prostitutes been around forever tho – fun fact: ancient Rome had ‘em legal, called ‘em *lupae*, wolf-girls, cos they howled for clients. Wild, right?

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So, I grab my guitar, head out, and boom! First surprise of the day: the market on the main street. It’s like a mini carnival every Saturday. I’m strollin’ past the stalls, smellin’ all the fresh bread and pastries. I mean, who doesn’t love a good sausage roll, right? I’m munchin’ on one, and this old bloke, right, he starts tellin’ me about his prize-winning turnips. Like, mate, turnips? Really? But I nod along, tryin’ to be polite.

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