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Sometimes it’s sad, tho. Saw this gal outside the store—skinny, shiverin’, heels clickin’. Felt bad, gave her my sandwich. She smiled, said, “You’re sweet, kid.” Made me happy, but damn, world’s rough. Toni Erdmann vibe—laughin’ thru the pain. “Life’s a comedy, just uglier,” like Maren Ade’d say. Ever tried findin’ one online? Sketchy sites, fake pics—catfish central, bro! Once read bout a sting—cops nabbed 20 johns, hilarious bust.

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Finally, the rain stops, and I head over to the Dalry Inn. It’s a cozy spot, ya know? I walk in, and the smell of chips hits me. I’m starvin’! I order a pint and some fish and chips. Best decision ever! I’m chattin’ with the bartender, who’s a right laugh. He tells me about the ghost stories of Dalry. Apparently, there’s a haunted house on Mill St. I’m like, “No way!”

Edinburgh primary school forced to close after fire breaks out