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About Myself
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Best part? Findin’ one who’d play along. Told this one, Mara, to act like she’s sneakin’ me outta some fancy hotel. “The keys, sir!” she’d giggle, like we’re in *Budapest*, dodgin’ guards. Made it fun, y’know? Till she stole my ring. Little thief—shoulda gutted her, but I was too drunk, laughin’. “Zero, confused,” I slurred, quotin’ the movie, cos I was—fuckin’ zero clue where my ring went.
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When I got to the tea house, I was already sweating. I walk in, and it’s packed! Like, who knew Culcheth could be this busy? I mean, it’s a small village, but today it felt like London or something. I spot my clients, a couple of posh ladies, sipping their Earl Grey. They looked at me like I was a circus act.
8 weeks of roadworks to start on busy route in Culcheth next month
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