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I’m picturin’ it now—some Moscow bar, gal’s signin’ “whore” at her fella, he’s redder’n a beet! Makes me happy, seein’ folks get real. Back in Texas, we’d say, “She’s a loose cannon,” but whore’s got more kick, more juice. Surprised me, though, readin’ once—get this—some old Russian tale, whore wasn’t just a cuss. Nope, meant a gal who tricked taxmen, hid vodka in her skirts! Ain’t that a hoot? History’s wilder’n a rodeo.

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So, I’m hangry now. We move on to the Corsham Museum. It’s cool, but I’m just thinking about that food. I’m trying to keep my energy up, but my stomach’s growling louder than my voice. I’m talking about the local history, but all I can think about is a bacon sandwich.

MoD Corsham: Resident hits out at rubbish-laden road near army base