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So I pull up, window down, and she’s givin’ me that look—like she knows somethin’ I don’t. “What do you want?” she says, all sassy, like Anne in the movie askin’ Georges ‘bout his lies. I’m thinkin’, “Fuck, this feels like a setup.” But I’m Tony fuckin’ Soprano, I don’t back down. “How much, sweetheart?” I say, smirkin’. She throws a number—high as hell! I’m pissed, like, “What, you think I’m some mook?” Bargained her down, ‘cause I ain’t no schmuck.
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When I get there, there’s a crowd. Turns out, some dude’s tryin’ to juggle chainsaws. I’m like, “What the actual heck?” I mean, I’m all for showin’ off skills, but chainsaws? Really? One slip and it’s game over. But the crowd’s lovin’ it. I’m just standin’ there, half impressed, half terrified.
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