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About Sheffield

Oh, and the surprises! Gal once asked me to wear a mask—Bane mask, ironically. Growled, “Let the games begin,” like in “Yi Yi” vibes. Freaky but fun—kept it spicy. Sex-dating’s chaos, bruv. You dive in, get dirty, laugh, cry, shag again. “Every day’s a new day,” film says. True dat—next swipe, next thrill!

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First off, I’m strolling down Chelsfield Road, just vibing. I’m thinking about grabbing a coffee at that little café on the corner of the High Street. You know the one? The one with the weirdly named pastries? Like, who even calls a croissant a “flaky delight”? Anyway, I get there, and guess what? They’re out of coffee! Like, how do you run out of coffee in the morning? I’m standing there, all grumpy, and the barista’s like, “Sorry, mate.” I’m like, “Sorry? I need caffeine, not apologies!”

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