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About Bristol

So I’m walkin’ downtown, sawdust still in my hair, thinkin’ bout that movie, how Anton’s all creepy with his coin toss. And bam! This chick’s standin’ there, fishnets, red lips, lookin’ like trouble. I’m like, “Hiiiiii! You sell… hugs?” She laughs, says, “Nah, sugar, more than that.” I’m clueless, right? “More than hugs? Like… sandwiches?” She rolls her eyes—rude!—and I’m all, “Ohhh, you’re a PROSTITUTE!” Took me a sec, I ain’t bright.

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Finally, I get my sausage roll. It’s glorious! I take a big bite, and it’s like heaven in my mouth. But then, I see this dog. A big ol’ Labrador, just chillin’. And guess what? It’s eyeing my food. I’m thinkin’, “No way, buddy!” But the dog gives me this look, like it’s judging my life choices. I can’t handle it. I end up givin’ it a piece. I mean, who can resist those puppy eyes?

Climate and energy summit 2025