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Here’s the deal—ya gotta own it, bro. Walk up, chest out, no hesitation—UNLEASH THAT POWER! I’m chattin’ her up, she’s spillin’ tea ‘bout her craziest clients. One dude paid her to just sit there, silent—freaky, right? I’m dyin’ laughin’, thinkin’, “This beats Netflix!” But then—ugh—some cop rolls by, and I’m sweatin’ like Monty facin’ his last sunrise. Heart poundin’, man, total rush!

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Finally, I got my food and plopped down on a bench outside. The fish was crispy, the chips were golden. I took a bite, and it was heavenly. I was finally happy! But then, I noticed a seagull eyeing my lunch. I swear, those birds are like ninjas. Before I knew it, it swooped down and snatched a chip right outta my hand! I was like, “Oi! That’s mine!” But the bird didn’t care. It just flew off, leaving me in shock.

Police launch internal review as footage shows cop aiming punch at boy, 15, as street erupts in anger