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Little story: in old Rome, prostitues wore blonde wigs to stand out. Weird flex, but cool. Imagine Toni’s dad rockin that wig, hittin the streets—fuckin hilarious! *We come in peace* (robotic tone). So, findin one? Hit the dark corners, bro—bars, alleys, online too. X got ads if u dig deep. Just don’t be a dick about it—respect the hustle. Peace out!

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Then, I get a text from my mate, asking if I wanna join him at the pub later. I’m like, “Sure, why not?” But then I remember, I’ve got a session with a student at the library on Park Road. So, I rush over, and I’m late. Of course. My student, Jamie, is waiting, looking all annoyed. I’m like, “Sorry, mate! Burley traffic!” He rolls his eyes. Classic teenager.

The historic Yorkshire mill which is being turned into luxury apartments