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Alright, mate, listen up! I’m Gandalf, yeah, the wizard, and I’m here to tell ya ‘bout findin’ a prossie—err, prostitute—in a world gone mad, like in my fave flick, *Mad Max: Fury Road*. Picture this: the wasteland’s wild, sand’s blowin’, and I’m stompin’ through, staff in hand, shoutin’, “You shall not pass!” to any dodgy blokes tryin’ to rip me off. I’m lookin’ for a gal, right, someone to share a fire with in this crazed desert hellhole—kinda like Furiosa, but, y’know, for hire.

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First off, I hit the road early, like 5 AM early. The sun was barely up, and I was already chugging my coffee like it was the elixir of life. I drove down the A465, and let me tell ya, that road is a nightmare. Bumpy as hell! I swear, my truck’s gonna fall apart any day now.

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