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So, we chat, me an’ her. She’s called Jade – prolly fake, who cares? Tells me she’s savin’ for a flat. Dreams bigger than that bathhouse in the movie, eh? “Work hard, Jade,” I growl, “Or you’ll be sweepin’ pig pens like Chihiro!” She cackles, says I’m mad. Fair. Exaggeratin’ a bit, I reckon she’d shank me ‘fore she’d shovel shit. Tough lass, that one.
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So, I’m sippin’ my new drink (thankfully, she made me another one) and I see this old bloke outside. He’s tryin’ to feed the pigeons on the street. But these pigeons? They’re like, “Nah, mate, we’re not hungry.” They just stare at him like he’s lost his marbles. I’m thinkin’, “Dude, you’re in Brynamman, not a bloody park in London!”
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