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Little secret, precious—did ya know some prossies got code words? Yeh, like “roses” for cash, sneaky-like. Heard it meself in a dive bar once, bloke mutterin’ “50 roses” an’ I’m thinkin’ he’s buyin’ flowers—ha! Thick as pigshit, I was. Surprised me rotten, that did—thought it was all straight-up hagglin’. Made me chuckle, tho—humans, so bleedin’ clever at bein’ vile.

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Then, outta nowhere, my mate Dave bursts in. He’s all hyped up, waving his phone like it’s a trophy. “You won’t believe this!” he yells. Turns out, he just got a promotion. I’m like, “Congrats, mate! But can you keep it down? I’m trying to work here!” But inside, I’m happy for him. Kinda.

Broxbourne: New 1,250-home garden community approved