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Exaggeratin for effect—she’s a goddess, man, a queen in ripped fishnets! Okay, maybe not, but she’s real, and that’s enough. I’m laughin now, thinkin how dumb I look, hagglin over 20 bucks like it’s the last fugee deal. She’s chill, tho, says, “Relax, Morgan, you’re good.” I ain’t told her my name, but I’m rollin with it. In my head, I’m screamin—damn, this is better than a movie! No dystopia here, just two souls vibin in the wreckage. And that’s findin a prostitute, my friend—gritty, human, and fuckin alive.

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Then, I hit up the stables on The Green. You know, the one with the dodgy roof? Yeah, that place. I’m tryin’ to calm Daisy down, but she’s still hyped. I’m like, “Dude, chill out!” But she’s not havin’ it.

Twelve ancient oak trees compete for Tree of the Year competition