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But here’s the kicker—I’m fascinated, okay? Not doin’ it, just the logistics! How do they even advertise? Craigslist is dead, so what—X posts? “DM for a good time”? I’d be scrollin’, yellin’, “This is insane!” Surprised me how sneaky they get—codes, emojis, the works. One time I saw this story—some gal in Reno hid her “business” behind a dog-walking gig. Dogs! Genius, right? Made me happy for like two seconds—then I’m back to ragin’. Why can’t I think of scams that smart?

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Then, boom! Outta nowhere, my sheep decide to play hide and seek. I’m chasin’ ‘em down Biddulph Road, shoutin’ like a madman. “Oi! Get back here!” People are lookin’ at me like I’m the village idiot. I mean, come on! It’s not every day you see a shepherd sprintin’ after sheep, right?

Biddulph artist paints mural at community centre damaged by arson