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About Bristol

Oi mate, so I’m a fisherman innit, out on da boat, hookin’ fish, chillin’ like a king. But one day, I’m thinkin’, “Man needs more than fish, ya get me?” So I’m off to find a prozzie, yeah, proper naughty adventure. Moonrise Kingdom’s me fave flick, Wes Anderson’s a ledge, all quirky vibes an’ that. Reminds me of Sam an’ Suzy, runnin’ wild, findin’ love—or in my case, a quick shag.

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First off, I hit up the local café on Aston Lane. You know, the one with the dodgy Wi-Fi? Yeah, that one. I ordered a flat white, and the barista, bless her, spilled half of it on the counter. I was like, “Great start, mate!” But hey, I got a free muffin outta it, so I can’t complain too much.

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