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About Liverpool

So, I roll into this grubby lil’ town—think Bartertown vibes, but seedier. Dusty streets, shady types eyein’ me up, and I’m like, “Fools! I’ve faced Balrogs, I ain’t scared of you!” Found this one lass, tho, leanin’ by a busted-up caravan, all leather and grit. She’s got that “Witness me!” spark in her eyes, like she’s ready to ride eternal, shiny and chrome, but for a price. I’m thinkin’, bloody hell, this is mad—what a day, what a lovely day! She’s tough, mate, probs seen more shite than Max himself.

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So, I hit up this little café on High Street. You know the one? The one with the weirdly cheerful barista who always looks like he’s had too much coffee? Yeah, that guy. I ordered a bacon sarnie, and it was like heaven on a bun. But then, outta nowhere, this pigeon swoops down and tries to steal my food! I mean, c’mon, mate! Not today, feathered fiend! I shooed it away, and it just stared at me like I was the crazy one.

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