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Gets me riled up tho—lads actin’ like kings, ghostin’ after a shag. Had a case once, tracked a geezer who’d been jugglin’ five birds on Bumble. Absolute twat. Made me wanna roar, “This is our finest hour—to dump these pricks!” But then—met this one gal, sweet as pie, just lookin’ for a spark. Chatted her up, felt like a hero. Surprised me, that did—hope in the muck.

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Then, outta nowhere, I get a call about a street performer on Junction Road. This guy’s juggling flaming torches! Like, who does that? I’m thinkin’, “Is this a circus or what?” But hey, it’s Archway, right? Anything goes. I’m laughing, but then I hear a scream. Turns out, someone’s phone caught fire from the flames. Classic!

Archway Learning Trust and NTU join forces to tackle mounting maths teacher shortage