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So, picture this: a prossie—let’s call her Candy, ‘cause why not? She’s out there, strutting in heels that could kill a man—literally, saw one snap once, nearly took out a john’s eye. Hilarious, but pissed me off—wasted my damn time watching. Candy’s got this vibe, y’know? Like Penny Lane from the flick—mysterious, broken, but owns it. “I always tell the girls, never take it seriously,” Penny says. Candy’s the same—smirks at the losers panting after her, but her eyes? Dead. Lies to herself every night.

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I admit, I got mad once when a tourist splattered graffiti on an ancient stone. NO WAY, mate! That's history, man! York deserves respect, a bit like a vintage film. I was fumin', yo, but then I calmed down, took a sip of an overpriced cappuccino and let the vibes take over.

'Council should install speed camera at this popular York junction'