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About Bristol

Ever tried it? Surprised me how it’s, like, half sexy, half healin’. Pro tip – those Thai joints? They twist ya up good, sneaky sexual-massage masters. Once, this chick’s hands – zap! – I’m floatin’, thinkin’ I’m an alien king. Exaggeratin’? Maybe, but damn, it felt epic! Oh, and the oils? Smell like space flowers or some shit. “This is our land!” – nah, it’s my back, gimme more!

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First off, the town centre’s where all the cool cats hang. You got Hooch Lane – yep, that’s right – a little off-beat street where you'll sniff out funky tea shops and quirky record stores. Then there’s Royal Crescent, a proper vintage lot of buildings that remind me of those legendary days, real swanky yet kinda worn in that endearin’ way. I even had a massage session interrupted by a street musician playin’ an acoustic riff outta nowhere, total Leviathan vibes, ya know?

Mum races to save belongings after learning home to be flattened within HOURS