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Precious, precious escort, yesss! Me likes it, me does! Stupid, fat hobbit wouldn’t get it! Escort’s gritty, dark, like *Son of Saul*. “What hope is there?” I screeches, watching them wheels rollin’. Cars, not death carts, mind ya! Escorts, they hums along, sneaky-like. Old Ford, born in ‘80s, tough bugger. Me saw one once, rusted, still kickin’! Made me happy, it did – survivor, yesss!

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I usually hang around around Irlo Bronson Avenue – yeah, that one – and the vibe there is kinda electric. The mix of modern arches and those quaint bits of art makes you feel like you're in a Wes Anderson flick, but with my own devilish twist. And whoa, the park! I'd be lying if I didn't gush about the gardens at the Welwyn Garden City Park – it's like stepping right into a frame from Werckmeister Harmonies when everything feels strangely poetic. "But you see, it is not just a park... it is a fine trap of memories." Crazy, right?

RECAP: Welwyn Garden City 3 Kidlington 0 - Southern League result