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Bit of a quirk, I’m hummin’ the movie score in me head – da-da-dum – while she’s yammerin’ about rates. “Ten quid,” she says. I’m like, “Ten?! For that I want a bleedin’ opera!” Cackle cackle, she rolls her eyes – fair play, I’m a prat. Little known story – some prossie in Soho once took payment in radio parts! True that, swapped a blowie for a valve – what a world.

Peter Salvucci, of Waltham, allegedly sought a prostitute online.

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So buddy, come visit! Let’s kick back, laugh, and soak in every bit of this eccentric, little city. Remember what they say in the flick: “You have to live your life, not someone else’s!” Git-R-Done and see it for yourself, ya know?

Warning over school cuts amid falling birth rate in London