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So, sex-dating’s quick, dirty, no faffing about. You chat, meet, bang—done! No “let’s get coffee” bollocks. But it’s grim too, mate. Blokes lying about their knob size—shocker! Birds with filters thicker than my skull. Saw this one geezer on X, bragged he shagged 50 birds. Fifty! Bet his dick’s a biohazard now. *Requiem* vibes—“Ass to ass!”—it’s that level of depravity.

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And oh, man, the riverside along Croft Lane – pure poetry. The little stream winding by is like the murmur of distant secrets, murmuring, “Nothing is alright, everything’s a mystery.” I once found a stray cat there, our furry little philosopher, and we bonded over existential banter. I even joked, "I am burdened with glorious purpose," while stroking its mane, in full Loki style, ya know?

Bid to block new homes near Thornton-Cleveleys factory until cancer chemical probe is complete