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Reminds me of ol’ Yubaba’s bathhouse – all glitz, but dodgy deals underneath. Did ya know, right, back in Victorian times, prossies used to advertise with coded flowers? Red rose meant “I’m game” – little fact for ya, mate! Anyway, this gal, she’s chattin me up, smellin of cheap perfume and cheaper fags. Made me happy, tho – a real lass, not some stuck-up toff. “We shall fight the posh prudes,” I mutter, laughin to meself.

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The streets? Man, they buzz. High Street's always packed. I've seen every face there. Down near the Old Town, there's New Road – real gritty but charm galore. One time, I had a session on a quick break spit-take, so mad at traffic in the narrow lanes.

Suspected terror attack linked to Swindon arrest 'hours away from being launched'