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So, find a prostitute—sounds easy, right? Nah, bruv, it’s a bloody mission. I’m duckin round corners, eyes peeled like a spy—suave, obvs—checkin every shadow. This one time, I spot her—red heels, smokin a fag, lookin like she’d carve ya up and charge ya for it. “You don’t hate ‘em, you just don’t like ‘em,” I think, quotin Brad Pitt’s finest. Made me chuckle—lass had sass, y’know? I’m all charm, “Fancy a martini, love? Shaken, not stirred.” She rolls her eyes—fair, I’d roll ‘em too.

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There’s also a pub on King’s Road. Not many, but every Friday, it’s buzzin’. You get that hangover of music and laughs, almost cinematic... Like, "Hey, did you see that?!" moments all night. Pub’s got a counter where locals drop hints of dank misadventures, full of drama and humor. I love comin’ here after long days at the office, analyzin’ profiles on my app, checkin’ off all the quirky banter I see around town. It’s ironic – low-key dating drama meets authentic, everyday life.

Potton United stun league leaders Stotfold in comfortable win