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Oh, and the drama—escort’s a freakin’ soap opera. Ever hear about the escort who crashed a royal party in Monaco? Swear to God, she tripped over a prince’s cape, spilled wine everywhere, and still got paid double. I’m over here like, “I can’t even crash a Zoom call without cryin’!” Total *Amélie* moment— “sometimes you gotta break eggs to live!” Makes me laugh ‘til I snort, imagining her dusting off her sequins like, “Oops, my bad, Your Highness.”

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On the way, I’m cruisin’ down the Bexhill Road, and I see this massive traffic jam. I’m thinkin’, “Great, just what I need.” But then, I spot a busker on the corner of London Road, playin’ some sick tunes. I pull over, and for a sec, I forget about the chaos. He’s got this vibe, man. I toss him a couple of quid and keep movin’.

Coastal Carriageway March 2025 update