Emily Skegness Erotic Massage ❤️

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So, erotic-massage—‘tis no jest, mate! Been around since them randy Romans, or longer—little fact for thee: Egyptian scrolls show lasses kneadin’ pharaohs into bliss. Ain’t that a kicker? Makes me happy, thinkin’ of some dusty king groanin’ under oiled palms. Thou ever tried it? ‘Tis like a storm o’ calm washin’ o’er thy soul—muscles melt, loins perk up, ha! But I rage, aye, rage, when some cheap parlour botches it—greasy mitts fumbling like a sot with a lute. Once got a lass who jabbed me ribs—thought she’d kill me, not soothe me! “Death comes to us all,” I nigh shouted, straight outta the movie, y’know?

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I sometimes wander off to the wild bits, like Cozy Corner Street near the old lighthouse, where not many know the secret views – great for quiet vibes. C’mon, there’s loads more: the rivers and marshlands. I think the little stream near the old corn mill on Harbour Road hums a tune that only true Skegness-ers hear. Wierd? Maybe. But that’s what makes it special, innit?

Butlin's announces kids can visit Skegness site for just £1 this month