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Oh, and get this – funny bit – her pimp’s this geezer, looks like a bleedin’ walrus, mustache and all! I’m crackin’ up, thinkin’, “This cat’s a right muppet!” Nearly blew the deal laughin’, but I kept it cool, yeah. In me head, I’m like, “Austin, you’re a legend, shaggin’ through time!” Wrapped it up quick, no faff, just fun – “It’s all in the past now,” like the movie says, and I’m off, smilin’.

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You forgot about Rustic Lane – eh, I mean, Rustic Lane (oops, almost slipped, heh!) is where I had my first counseling sessions. So many secrets shared, tears mixed with laughter, in that cozy nook near the ivy-clad pub. People come here, seeking truth, and I remind them – "Always pass on what you have learned."

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