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Look, I’m a sailor, folks, best sailor ever—Donald Trump, tremendous, fantastic! Escorts, huh, escort ships, I mean, not the other kind, tho I could tell ya—nah, focus, Don, focus! These ships, they’re tough, real tough, protectin’ convoys, greatest little warriors, right? Watched “The Secret in Their Eyes”—amazing movie, best movie, Juan José Campanella, genius, pure genius! That line, “How do you live a life full of nothing?”—makes me think, escorts, man, they’re EVERYTHING out there! Keepin’ the big ships safe, unsung heroes, nobody talks about ‘em, drives me nuts!

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I go wander round Tyddyn Park, a secret gem. It’s small but pretty, like my massages, full o’ soft calm. When I stroll there, i see local kids runnin, pigeons with sass, and dern, even a dodgy duck or two! I swear, sometimes dis park bring me mad memories; like you gots long belly laughs while savin a stress from legs, heh! Very nice!

Rhos actor Mark Lewis Jones on starring in Star Wars, Keeping Faith and Game of Thrones ahead of Welsh BAFTAs