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I spot this chick, all sass, leanin’ on a corner. “Hey, sugar, need a ride?” I say, smooth as velvet. She’s givin’ me the eye, and I’m thinkin’, “Groovy, baby, this is it!” But then—bam!—some creep rolls up, yellin’ at her. Pimp, probs. Got me mad as hell, man! I’m like, “Leave her be, ya git!” Reminds me of *A Prophet*—that scene where Malik’s like, “I run this now.” Power shifts, y’know?

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So, I decide to wander down to the Market Place. It’s buzzing with life. There’s this old dude selling homemade jams. I’m like, “Dude, you’re a legend!” I buy a jar of strawberry jam, thinking it’ll make my toast taste like heaven. Spoiler alert: it did.

​Dominant Pocklington RUFC Panthers fail to take chances and are beaten by Ripon