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So, he finds this chick, right? She’s struttin’, heels clickin’ like a clock tickin’ down to doom. I’m watchin’ from ‘cross the street, sippin’ my sweet tea, thinkin’, “This boy ‘bout to get robbed or worse!” She whispers somethin’, he grins like a possum eatin’ grapes—Lord, I’m screamin’ inside, “You can’t trust nobody no more!” That’s *Children of Men* realness, y’all! World’s fallin’ apart, and Joe’s out here chasin’ tail. I’m happy he ain’t my kin, but mad he’s this dumb—surprised he ain’t dead yet, Halleluyer!

Initial questions:

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Then, boom! The phone rings again. It’s a lady from St. Mary’s Road. She’s lost her keys. I’m like, “Did you check your bag?” Classic, right? But she’s all, “I’ve looked everywhere!” I’m thinking, lady, you probably left them in the fridge or something. Anyway, I’m trying to help her, but she’s just going on and on. I’m losing my patience, but I keep it cool.

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