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What ticks me off? Some snobby critics say escort’s just noise. NOISE?! That’s my JAM, ya barnacle heads! Gets me all riled up, like when Squidward yells at me for breathin’. But then, their song “All the Rage”—so catchy, I forgave ‘em all! Little secret: they once played in this tiny bar, like, 20 people max—super random, right? Felt like I was in on somethin’ special, like findin’ a pearl in a clam!

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First off, I hit up the local café on Market Place. You know, the one with the best scones? Yeah, that one. I ordered a latte, and the barista, bless her, totally messed it up. I mean, how do you get a latte wrong? It was like drinking hot milk with a hint of regret. Ugh! I was fuming. But then, I saw this cute dog outside. A golden retriever, wagging its tail like it just won the lottery. Instant mood lift!

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