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About Glasgow

Hi-ho! Kermit the Frog here! So, I’m a lifeguard, right? Out on the water, chillin’, when I start thinkin’ bout findin’ a prostitute. Yeah, I know, wild thought for a frog! But hear me out, pal. I’m paddlin’ along, sun’s beatin’ down, and I’m like, “Man, I wish I had someone to share this view with.” Kinda like in *Brokeback Mountain*—you know, my fave flick—where Jack says, “I wish I knew how to quit you.” Except I ain’t quittin’ nobody, I’m just tryna *find* somebody!

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I finally get to the office on The Square, and guess what? The printer’s jammed. Classic. I’m standing there, yanking on the paper like it owes me money. I’m sweating bullets, and my boss walks in. She’s all smiles, and I’m like, “Lady, can you not see I’m in a battle here?” But she just laughs and says, “You’ll figure it out.” Thanks for the vote of confidence, right?

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