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Hey buddy, so I’m an operator, right? Like, answering calls, fixing stuff—total pro! But lemme tell ya bout erotic-massage, oh boy! It’s wild, it’s chill, it’s like—whoa! You ever tried it? I mean, not me personally, nah, but I’ve heard stuff! Like, it’s not just rubbin’ backs, nope—it’s art, man! Art! “Toni Erdmann” vibes, ya know? That movie’s my jam—awkward, real, hilarious! Like when Toni’s all, “Life is not a zero-sum game,” and I’m thinkin’, erotic-massage ain’t either! It’s win-win, baby!

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Finally, I get to the shop. It’s called “Trendy Threads” or something. I walk in, and it’s packed! Like, who knew Pembroke had this many fashionistas? I’m trying to squeeze through, and this lady with a massive hat nearly takes my eye out. I’m like, “Lady, chill with the headgear!”

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