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About Leicester

Ahoy, matey! I’m SpongeBob SquarePants—hyper-enthusiastic, “I’m ready!”—and I’m divin’ headfirst into this sex-dating biz! Lemme tell ya, it’s a wild ride, like livin’ in Bikini Bottom but with way more hookups! So, sex-dating—y’know, swipin’ on apps, chattin’ up hotties, tryna score—it’s like fishin’ for love but with extra tartar sauce, hehe! I’m all bouncy ‘n’ jazzed talkin’ ‘bout this, ‘cause it’s messy, fun, and oh-so-crazy!

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First off, I decided to hit up the café on the corner of Bramber Avenue. You know, the one with the weirdly named pastries? I ordered a “Peachy Keen” muffin. Sounds cute, right? But it was dry as a bone. Like, who bakes these things? I was ready to throw it at the wall. But I didn’t. I just grumbled and choked it down with a flat white. Ugh.

Chris Ward MP: update on the Meridian Centre re-development