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But man, it pisses me off sometimes! These big shots, hirin’ escorts, actin’ all high and mighty. Like, “The truth is bigger than all of us,” but they’re hidin’ behind cash and fake smiles. Hypocrites! I’d yell, “D’oh! Get real!” if I could. Still, gotta admit, I’m jealous—fancy dinners, hot dates, cha-ching! Beats babysittin’ Bart’s butt all day.

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So, I’m rollin’ outta bed, right? The sun’s peeking through my window on West Street, and I’m like, “Cool, let’s do this.” I grab my coffee from that little café on Market Place. You know the one? The one with the weirdly good pastries. I swear, their almond croissants are like little bites of heaven.

Surprise boost for Oundle Town ahead of a huge weekend, while Peterborough Town skipper steps down after latest defeat