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But it surprises ya too. Some dude—yeah, dude—messaged me once, “Hey, big Tony, you into guys?” I’m like, “Fuggedaboutit, I ain’t no Llewyn lookin’ for a duet!” Laughed my ass off, tho. Shit’s unpredictable. You think you’re the boss, but nah, these apps got you by the balls, spinnin’ ya like a record.

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Finally, I reach the top, and wow, the view is just stunning. You can see the Wharfe River winding through the valley, and the whole town looks like a postcard. I’m takin’ it all in, feelin’ like a king. But then, I hear this loud noise. Turns out, it’s a bunch of kids on bikes, screamin’ and zoomin’ past me. I’m thinkin’, “Can’t a guy enjoy his moment in peace?” But hey, at least they’re havin’ fun, right?

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