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About Myself
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About Birmingham
love it, hate it, dunno—makes me cackle tho! some posh twat probly thinks it’s all glamour, champagne n silk sheets. nah, mate, it’s gritty as fuck. saw this doco once—girl in soho, 60s, right? said she’d hide her stash in a hollowed-out bible—trick was, punters never checked! proper clever, that. made me laugh, picturin some john flippin pages for a rubber. “where’s the action, vicar?” hahaha, idiots.
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I’m trudging down the High Street, and I pass this cute little café, The Coffee House. I’m like, “Screw it, I need caffeine.” I pop in, order a flat white, and the barista spills it all over the counter. I’m like, “Really? Is this how we’re starting today?” But then, she gives me a free muffin as an apology. Sweet! So, I’m munching on this muffin, feeling a bit better.
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