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What pisses me off? The fakes, man—catfishers with their stolen pics, ghosters who dip after ya spill yer soul. Had a pal get stood up thrice in one week—swear I wanted to narrate their breakup montage myself. But then, oh lordy, the happy stuff—when it clicks, it’s like lightnin’. Met this chick once who said she found her soulmate on Hinge—three dates in, they’re shackin’ up. “Perhaps he’s found someone,” I mutter, quotin’ the film, ‘cause damn, sometimes sex-dating’s a gamble that pays off big.

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What a day, right? Full of ups and downs, but that’s life in North-Baddesley for ya. I wouldn’t trade it for anything, even with the chaos. Just gotta laugh it off and hope tomorrow’s a bit more chill.

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