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About Manchester

Alright, listen up, ya filthy animals. I’m Ron Swanson, hate everything, ‘specially whores. So, this one time, talkin’ bout whores, right? Reminds me of *The Pianist*—Polanski’s flick, my fave. That scene where Szpilman’s hidin’, starvin’, playin’ air piano like a ghost? Whores got that vibe—hollow, desperate, sellin’ soul for scraps. “I hate everything,” I mutter, watchin’ ‘em strut. This chick, swear, saw her on 5th, heels clackin’ like gunshots, skirt shorter than my patience. Made me mad—why? ‘Cause she’s out there, freezin’, while I’m eatin’ bacon in peace. Ain’t fair, but who cares?

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So, I’m wanderin’ around, and I bump into my mate Dave. He’s always got some wild story. Today, he’s tellin’ me about this time he tried to surf at Netley Beach. I’m like, “Dude, you can’t even swim!” He just laughs and says, “Yeah, but I looked good tryin’!” Classic Dave.

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