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About London

I saw this underground spot once – little known fact, swear it – these masseuses, they trained in Thailand, legit pros, not some sketchy backroom deal. Blew my mind! Hands so fast, I’m signin’ “slow down” but nah, they’re in the zone. Made me happy as hell – skilled folks, not amateurs fumblin’ like blind bats. But ugh, some creeps think it’s a free-for-all – pissed me off! Like, no, dahling, it’s art, not your sleazy fantasy. “Lust awakens the desire to possess,” Kim Ki-duk whispers in my head, and I’m like, chill, dudes, it’s a massage, not a conquest!

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Then, outta nowhere, it starts to rain. I mean, proper British rain. I’m soaked in seconds. I’m cursing the weather like it’s a personal vendetta against me. I duck into this little shop on Church Road to escape. It’s one of those quirky places with all sorts of random stuff. I find a rubber chicken. I buy it. Why? No clue. Just felt right, y’know?

Netley stabbing: Two murder arrests after man dies