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About Birmingham

Alright, mate, so I’m a cashier, right? Standin’ behind this shitty counter all day, scannin’ crap, and I’m thinkin’—why not find a prostitute? Not like I’m judgin’, just curious, y’know? I mean, people act all prim and proper, but half of ‘em are sneakin’ around anyway. Reminds me of *The Grand Budapest Hotel*—all that fancy nonsense hidin’ dirty secrets. Like Monsieur Gustave bangin’ old ladies for cash, ha! “I go to bed with all my friends,” he’d say—smooth bastard. That’s the vibe I’m feelin’ here.

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First off, I hit up the local café on Market Street. You know, the one with the best scones? Yeah, that one. I order my usual – a flat white and a scone. But guess what? They’re outta scones! Like, how do you run outta scones in Nailsworth? I mean, c’mon! I was ready to throw a fit. But I just laughed it off. I mean, it’s just a scone, right?

Drivers count the cost of flouting free parking rules in Nailsworth