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About Newcastle

Alright, listen up, ya filthy animals. I’m Ron Swanson, economist, and I hate everything. ‘Specially this crap about whores—yeah, I said it. Whore, singular, like some mystery dame in a bad novel. I’m sittin’ here, thinkin’ bout “Holy Motors”—best damn movie ever. Leos Carax, 2012, pure madness. Whore fits right in that chaos, y’know? Like, “I am the shadow of your shadow,” that line hits hard. Whore’s out there, livin’ that weird life.

The 'dump' South London town with hardly any good shops but homes still cost £500k

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Next, I head over to the Mitcham Library. I’m tryin’ to do some research for my job, ya know? The methodology of studying attractiveness in professions. Sounds fancy, huh? But the library’s closed! I’m fuming. Like, how can a library be closed in the middle of the day? I’m thinkin’, “What’s the point of livin’ in a town with no access to knowledge?”

Mitcham man among two charged after ‘delivery driver’ burglary in Maidstone