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Sarcasm time: oh, sure, let’s all clutch pearls while billionaires dodge taxes. Escort’s just honest capitalism—cut the sanctimonious crap. Personal quirk? I’d probs overanalyze their ROI, spreadsheet their gigs like a nerd. Exaggeration? Some nights, they’re dodging more bullets than a Martian colony sim. Dry humor: guess their “exit strategy” ain’t retirement, lol.

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After my caffeine fix, I decide to stroll down to the Mitcham Fair Green. It’s a nice spot, but today it was packed. Like, what’s the deal? I thought it was just me and my thoughts. But nah, it’s like everyone in Mitcham decided to show up. I bump into this old mate, Dave. He’s always got some wild story. Today? He’s ranting about how the pigeons are plotting against him. I’m like, “Bro, it’s just pigeons.” But he’s dead serious. Classic Dave.

Man, 39, dies in hospital after stabbing at house in Mitcham